Respectful Communication With Neurodivergent People
Disability etiquette that respects autonomy, communication and safety
Change the approach - not the person.
Speak directly, presume competence, allow processing time and recognise speech, behaviour, gesture, sign and AAC as communication. Use the person’s preferred identity language.
Avoid Dismissive Language
Try Respectful Support
“Calm down.”
“I can see this is a lot. What would help: space, quiet or support?”
“Stop crying.”
“It is okay to cry. I am here when you are ready.”
“You are okay.”
“Are you hurt, overwhelmed or needing help?”
“Look at me when I speak.”
“You can listen without looking at me. Take the time you need.”
“Use your words.”
“You can tell me, show me, point, sign or use your AAC.”
“Do not hit.”
“I will not let anyone be hurt. Let us make space and keep hands safe.”
“Stop yelling.”
“I want to understand. Would quieter surroundings or another way to communicate help?”
“Do not get upset.”
“Your feelings are valid. Let us work out what your body or environment needs.”
“That is enough.”
“Do you need a break, more time, space or a different option?”
“I am over this.”
“I need a short pause so we can both be safe. I will come back.”
NEURODIVERSITY-RESPECTING PRACTICE
- Speak to the person
- Offer choices
- Allow processing time
- Do not force touch or eye contact
- Protect privacy
Safety boundaries can be clear and respectful: stop harm, reduce demands, create space and support regulation.
NeuroReHub Online Resources | Neurodiversity and Disability Etiquette Use the person’s stated language preference. Avoid assumptions based on diagnosis, speech or outward behaviour. Independently rewritten and expanded from the shared Positive Language Alternatives visual